Ride out (chapter2)

Paul was chasing the twin brother (Shaw). He was chasing him down the main road. Paul was gaining on him but Shaw hit the breaks.Paul didn’t and zoomed ahead.Then once Paul was ahead Shaw zoomed after him.Now Shaw was behind Paul.Shaw accelerated to Paul . Shaw was going to crash into Paul !Paul looked ahead of him but he couldn’t see Shaw. He looked at the side mirror and Shaw was behind him.Shaw was closing in on Paul, Shaw was going to crash into Paul! Just at that moment Paul flung open the door and jumped out . Shaw crashed into Paul car.”Coward”. Shaw screamed, Shaw drove of. Paul got up and stumbled towards the bus.Paul was going incredibly fast in his and when he jumped out of the car he landed face first,spinning around.He got a ticket and sat at the back of the bus. No one was in the bus except a man sitting next to him.” Remember me”. He said with a evil smile .It was Jack,he was supposed to be in jail when Paul found him giving drugs to little children “Jack!” Paul gasped getting to his feet.Paul almost dropped to his feet,he was to weak to move and to weak to fight. Jack pulled out a pistol from his jacket “Bye Bye!”Jack said. Paul was laughing. Jack was laughing. Paul said ” Nice joke brother.”. Jack smiled and put the pistol back in his Jacket. ” How did you escape from the police”. Paul said. ” I tell you later “. ” We have a big bad brother, so we’re are we going”. ” Dubai we are going to get you a new car instead of having broken Lamborghini. There is a new car there, the Lykan Hypersport.” Jack said. Paul said ” oh yeah”.

For Paul

  

One thought on “Ride out (chapter2)

  1. Hi David,
    This post is really really good. I love how you presented it. You have used your punctuation to which is also really good. You have got loads of description and describing words. Also you have added some adjectives and this is amazing and I’m sure you and others agree.

    But next time could you add some more describing words and also could you say what you liked about your story thank you David. Thank you for blogging on the year 5 blog i appreciate it and keep it up David!!!!
    By Ella-Rose

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